My first memory of doing something big for their anniversary was in the mid 1980's. I'm sure that most years leading up to that point had consisted of me and my sister making some type of homemade card and singing our silly "Happy Anniversary" song that we made up when we were kids - basically repeating "Happy Anniversary" over and over to the tune of the William Tell Overture, also known as the theme song of the Lone Ranger. We were so creative.
In 1985 my sister and I decided we'd go ALL OUT. It was their 18th anniversary that year - I was 15 and my sister was 10. We hid in my room and made a gigantic sign that screamed "Happy Anniversary!" and hung it up in my parents' room when they weren't around, probably using up a whole roll of scotch tape to make sure it didn't fall down. Here was the end result - don't they look happy?
Now that I'm looking at this more closely, I'm realizing that we made the sign using the reams of computer paper my Dad used to bring home from work. I love so many things about this photo: my mom's big red hair, their savage tans, the peach colored toilet to the far right. But what I love best about this photo are the smiles on their faces. They always appreciated it when we took the time to make something for them.
A perfect example is what we did for their 25th anniversary. I was still in college, my sister in high school. I decided that we should make a huge collage using photos from the past 25 years. This was back in the day before digital cameras, scanners and email, so I had my sister rummage through endless boxes of extra prints in their basement to compile the best of the past 25 years. She mailed them to me in a huge envelope and I cut them all up and made an enormous collage, complete with a nice frame and centered with the quote "We are each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly embracing each other." To this day people who come over to their house will end up standing in front of that collage, staring endlessly at the photos and marveling at the love and dedication that went into it.
By their 30th we decided that we needed to throw a big party. Of course we had to have a surprise party - so we came up with an elaborate scheme to get them out of the house that consisted of me and John (my handsome new boyfriend) keeping them out of the house while my sister welcomed the guests and got everything set up. Obviously my sister got the raw end of the deal because she ended up having to clean the house, get all the food ready and entertain my parents' friends until we got back. In the meantime John and I were rowing around on the Potomac River with my parents and enjoying lunch at a Japanese steakhouse in Georgetown, supposedly celebrating their anniversary while the real party was still to come. On the way home we stopped at Glen Echo to ride the carousel, so by the time we turned into our neighborhood my dad's head was bobbing up and down as the day's activities finally started catching up to him.
Before the party my sister and I joked that when we'd pull up my dad would probably go off into the yard and start fiddling with the sprinkler or pulling weeds or doing SOMETHING yard work-ish and would end up missing the surprise. We sure knew our Tato - because that's exactly what happened. We pulled up into the driveway, my mom started walking toward the front door and my dad immediately went over to the hose and started messing around with it. As I pleaded with him to go inside, I saw my mom step through the front door and heard the raucous yell of "Happy Anniversary!" from their friends who were likely already on their second or third cocktail. I finally told my dad to GET INSIDE (he was still clueless) so he finally went in and got the second heart-stopping greeting of "Happy Anniversary!" The rest of the evening needs no explanation.
By their 40th we knew we had to do something really big, so we managed to get friends and family from different times of their lives to converge in Philadelphia for yet another surprise party. This one required a little more planning and delegating the task of getting them to the party to some of their oldest friends, who were only too happy to comply. My parents were beyond surprised - when they entered the hall of the Ukie Bar in Philly you could see the confusion on their faces, then realization as what we had done sunk in. We'd compiled a slide show of their lives together, thrown together an endless mix of songs that we grew up listening to and presented a spread of food that included herring, kobasa, beet salad and lots of garlic, thanks to the contributions of the Ukrainian guests.
The highlight was when my sister and I stood up and read a poem that we'd written for the occasion. I remember looking at my parents' faces while we were reading this and seeing their emotional reactions. When we played "Islands in the Stream" by Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton and told the happy couple to dance, I remember my parents' faces crumpling a bit as the emotions became too strong to hold back. It was a great moment and I don't have any photos or video of it, but it doesn't matter because it's so clear in my mind.
I'm glad we did something big for their 40th - can you imagine if we'd said - "Oh, let's wait til the 45th or the 50th and do something really big then." Never put off what you can do today.
Here is the poem my sister and I wrote for them and some photos of their years together . . .
One fine sunny day
On the steps of City
College
A tall handsome young man
Thought nothing of knowledge,
As a beautiful woman
Came strolling toward him.
He let out a soft, “Teeheehee!”
Her hand he did shake as he said,
“Just call me Richie!”
“Just call me Richie!”
Names were exchanged and in no time at all,
They were riding the subway
And having a ball!
They spoke every day
and found they had much in common,
Dough stuffed with potatoes and cheese,
Have you had borsch?
Yes, I’d like more please!
From Eastern Europe their
families did flee,
By boat, by foot,
Ending up in New
York City
Years went by and their love grew strong,
Then Marta began to wonder . . .
“Shouldn’t we be engaged after this long?”
As time passed,
Marta’s patience ran thin,
What was he waiting for?
She wanted to punch him in the chin!
Marta shed her tears and made a fuss,
Richard finally shouted,
“Fine, I’ll marry you, just SHUSH!”
Next came a most difficult thing
Showing Richard’s mother the engagement ring.
Babunia was a proud Lithuanian
He feared her reaction would be,
How dare he marry a Ukrainian?
Days passed and Marta did not hear from her fiance
He thought if he ignored her,
She would forget and go away!
But Richard finally did the right thing
And married the woman who wore his ring.
But very soon after he had to depart
And moved to Florida
Marta soon joined him in the tropical sun
Where to them was born baby number one!
In May 1970 Alina came along.
She took after her Tato, blue-eyed and calm.
With light brown hair and tiny ears,
She was the only child for five long years.
Until that day in hot July,
When Marta popped out the second apple of her eye,
Vanessa they named her and she grew to be
A big fat happy blonde baby!
The Legeckis family, now made of four,
Lived in Maryland
Where Richard would let us bury him in the sand,
And teach us of the ocean
And the waves so grand.
Marta honed her artistic abilities,
Doing calligraphy to pay for our activities.
She spoke to us only in Ukrainian,
While Richard tucked us in at night,
With stories of “Chicken Little” in Lithuanian!
We grew up fast,
And went through many phases.
Ice Skating, Piano lessons, mouthfuls of braces.
Those high school years were especially tough,
With Vanessa hiding beer in the bushes,
Marta had just about had enough!
But when family troubles arose,
Richard would leap to his toes
To run his fingers over the piano keys
It was his way of putting us at ease
The tune “White Christmas” was a favorite,
No matter the season
“Christmas Carols in July?” you may wonder.
Richard needed no reason.
Whatever the argument,
We always got through it,
It always ended with a “Go apologize to your mother”
And a, “But I didn’t DO it!”
Alina and Vanessa are finally grown
And Alina now has two children of her own.
Marta and Richard are now known as “Myma and Poppy”,
They can hand the kids back when things get sloppy.
They are enjoying the fruits of their years of labor
With the freedom to travel and a good life to savor.
Yes, it’s true that forty years have passed
Yet Marta and Richard have made their love last.
And although they are grayer and filled with more knowledge,
Richard still looks at Marta as he did that day
On the steps of City
College
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| Wedding Day - Sept. 9, 1967 |
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| Wedding Day - Sept. 9, 1967 |
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| 1968 in Florida - before kids :) |
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| Our house in Camp Springs MD - 1976 |
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| Disney - 1977 |
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| Ferry from Lewes to Cape May - 1981 |
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| Mount Vernon bike trail - early 1980s |
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| My Ukie school graduation - 1987 |
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| First grandchild - 2002 - Peeling potatoes in upstate NY |
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| 2006 at calligraphy conference |
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| Suzy-Q 2009 |
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| Suzy-Q 2009 |
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| With my sister and her son Levchyk in 2011. |
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| Philadelphia Spring 2011 |
Happy Anniversary to my lovely parents - one in Heaven and one here on Earth.
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