Happy Thoughts

My last post was pretty heavy, emotional, somewhat hard to read (and write!) - I had lots of nice comments on facebook as well as friends coming up to me over the past few days telling me how much it moved them and brought them to tears.  I myself have been close to tears more frequently over the past week - not just because of what is happening in my family, but also due to the heartfelt comments I've gotten from various people.  You don't realize how many people you've got in your corner until the chips are down - the ones who really care about you tend to come out of the woodwork at those times and it's quite enlightening.

But now onto happy thoughts - I've actually surprised myself by how positive I've been able to remain in light of my Dad's battle with ALS. I expected myself to be more down, even depressed.  Being in the healthcare field I've seen firsthand how illnesses can affect entire families.  But I've made a concerted effort to see the positive in everything and to enjoy the little things in life.  My mom and I like to refer to my kids as our "little blue pills" - because being with them seems to make everything all right.  Exercise is my other "blue pill" - running, swimming and just being physically active makes me feel stronger, empowered, able to conquer anything.  Diving back into learning to play guitar has also given me another focus - making music can be very uplifting (even if it sounds bad - which right now it does, despite my best efforts to follow Justin's online teachings)  Helping my parents and raising money for ALS research are two other things that have given me focus and have kept me from sinking too low.  Even though the disease is right in my face - I feel like I'm doing something positive when I give my Dad a massage or make my Mom laugh.  I've also started organizing a team to participate in the Walk to Defeat ALS again this year - another event that helps us all cope and keeps us from feeling completely helpless.  http://web.alsa.org/site/TR/Walks/DistrictofColumbia?team_id=196419&pg=team&fr_id=7449

I had a lovely day with my little girl yesterday.   We started the day by watching her dance in her recital - but that's not what made the day so special.  Afterwards I found myself alone with her - my husband had to go to a work function and my son was playing at a friend's house.  Instead of sitting around at home and doing housework (which is what I probably would have done), I decided to take her out.  We spent a relaxing few hours in Old Town Alexandria - meandering the waterfront, taking photos, eating ice cream, listening to street perfomers, playing by the fountain at City Hall.  We ended the afternoon at the Fish Market - at a tiny table on the tiny balcony on the second floor overlooking King Street - the same balcony John and I sat on years ago when we went to Old Town to pick up our wedding rings at the Irish Walk and celebrated with beer and oysters.  Ella was thrilled and kept saying "Mommy, why are you being so nice to me?"  I think it was her way of telling me how happy she was to get some special time just with me - a rarity these days.

So I've resolved not to let life get me down - even when it throws me a really tough curve ball.  I have so much to be thankful for and so much to look forward to.  Anytime I start to forget how good I really have it, I only need to look at my two little blue pills and everything seems brighter.